Alex, you’re such a talented writer. I’m absolutely certain you’re going to be published, and I can’t wait to buy your short story collection. I know it’s been said before, but your voice is genuinely powerful, it’s undeniable. The tone is extraordinary, and the simplicity and authenticity are astonishing. The narration feels perfectly aligned with the character you’re portraying, which brings him to life in such a raw, authentic way. I could hear his voice clearly in my head, and I loved that he had certain language tics, like saying “on the count of.” There’s nothing superficial or overdone; it’s pure and unfiltered. I can only imagine the work and polishing that went into getting to this level. I loved every moment of it. Thank you so much, Alex.
PS, some highlights :
He had some pure contentment in his heart that he ain’t had in a good while, I could recognize as much.
I didn’t get no weird looks neither till I made my way through the drive through at the Burger Kind, they got a good kick out of it and asked was I crazy and I said no.
And the good old wife of mine bringing in some stuff she was experimenting in the kitchen, muffins and such.
When I pulled up into the graveyard and asked the fellow there where the hell my Grandpappy’s lot was because I needed to get to digging he looked real shocked and said that ain’t how you supposed to do it fella, you need to call a hospital or something. So I did that.
He was wearing a paper Burger Kind crown and on it in black marker was written hello can I take your order or can’t I?
Close your eyes, Randy. Just close your eyes and smell death in the wind, that’s how.
And that smoke, of course that burnt bloody smoke. It singed the hairs right out of the inside of my nostrils, that couldn’t be nothing but death plus there was a little bit of a french fry smell mixed in there too.
I asked her if she knew that leather shoes have souls and she said well sure I think that all shoes have soles. Or at least that’s what I decided that she had said and I liked it so I didn’t ask her to clarify.
Except for this spinning blur was foggy and yellow and pappy instead of blue and a hedgehog.
You are way too kind Hassania, thank you so much for this amazing comment.
I am going to try the Ray Bradbury 52 stories in 52 weeks idea and hopefully 10-15 of them will be good enough to make a collection out of. Obviously trying to write 1 every week for 52 weeks is inevitably going to lead to some not-so-great (aka really bad) ones as well, but that is one of my weaknesses I need to get over anyway, being ok with sometimes writing something really bad. We are going to have a lot of dirt in our shovels while digging for treasure after all.
Knowing that you see the positives in my writing I can trust you also to let me know when a story I post is terrible or is missing some element that would make it better! I just want to get a little better every day.
That’s such a great idea. I’ve been wanting to try that out too, maybe I’ll take the leap! Good luck on your journey! Can't wait to see what comes out of it. And about that concern of yours: absolutely! You need to clear out all the bad words and stories first to let the great ones come out!!!
Yes! I’d love to discuss craft more, messaged you about it btw. I’m always nitpicking my own stories and trying to learn from the authors I look up to. I try to listen closely to the text, its tone, its rhythm. I’ll let you know if I ever hate one of your stories (very unlikely tbh), but for now you’re on a perfect streak! :)
Great to know that the lack of explanation was actually a positive. While revising I cut out a lot of explainy type things that I felt slowed the pace down and made it too long.
Alex, you’re such a talented writer. I’m absolutely certain you’re going to be published, and I can’t wait to buy your short story collection. I know it’s been said before, but your voice is genuinely powerful, it’s undeniable. The tone is extraordinary, and the simplicity and authenticity are astonishing. The narration feels perfectly aligned with the character you’re portraying, which brings him to life in such a raw, authentic way. I could hear his voice clearly in my head, and I loved that he had certain language tics, like saying “on the count of.” There’s nothing superficial or overdone; it’s pure and unfiltered. I can only imagine the work and polishing that went into getting to this level. I loved every moment of it. Thank you so much, Alex.
PS, some highlights :
He had some pure contentment in his heart that he ain’t had in a good while, I could recognize as much.
I didn’t get no weird looks neither till I made my way through the drive through at the Burger Kind, they got a good kick out of it and asked was I crazy and I said no.
And the good old wife of mine bringing in some stuff she was experimenting in the kitchen, muffins and such.
When I pulled up into the graveyard and asked the fellow there where the hell my Grandpappy’s lot was because I needed to get to digging he looked real shocked and said that ain’t how you supposed to do it fella, you need to call a hospital or something. So I did that.
He was wearing a paper Burger Kind crown and on it in black marker was written hello can I take your order or can’t I?
Close your eyes, Randy. Just close your eyes and smell death in the wind, that’s how.
And that smoke, of course that burnt bloody smoke. It singed the hairs right out of the inside of my nostrils, that couldn’t be nothing but death plus there was a little bit of a french fry smell mixed in there too.
I asked her if she knew that leather shoes have souls and she said well sure I think that all shoes have soles. Or at least that’s what I decided that she had said and I liked it so I didn’t ask her to clarify.
Except for this spinning blur was foggy and yellow and pappy instead of blue and a hedgehog.
You are way too kind Hassania, thank you so much for this amazing comment.
I am going to try the Ray Bradbury 52 stories in 52 weeks idea and hopefully 10-15 of them will be good enough to make a collection out of. Obviously trying to write 1 every week for 52 weeks is inevitably going to lead to some not-so-great (aka really bad) ones as well, but that is one of my weaknesses I need to get over anyway, being ok with sometimes writing something really bad. We are going to have a lot of dirt in our shovels while digging for treasure after all.
Knowing that you see the positives in my writing I can trust you also to let me know when a story I post is terrible or is missing some element that would make it better! I just want to get a little better every day.
Don’t thank me Alex, I meant all of it!
That’s such a great idea. I’ve been wanting to try that out too, maybe I’ll take the leap! Good luck on your journey! Can't wait to see what comes out of it. And about that concern of yours: absolutely! You need to clear out all the bad words and stories first to let the great ones come out!!!
Yes! I’d love to discuss craft more, messaged you about it btw. I’m always nitpicking my own stories and trying to learn from the authors I look up to. I try to listen closely to the text, its tone, its rhythm. I’ll let you know if I ever hate one of your stories (very unlikely tbh), but for now you’re on a perfect streak! :)
I laughed so often when Pappy was in the story! Honestly.
Another thing I liked was the lack of explanations. It felt like an honest account from the main character.
Great to know that the lack of explanation was actually a positive. While revising I cut out a lot of explainy type things that I felt slowed the pace down and made it too long.
You've got such a strong voice! Good read.
Gonna honor Grandpappy by buying a Whopper and fries, wearing my R-words jersey.
Fantastic story, Alex.
Thanks so much Ryan, truly appreciate your words!